Appearances Can Be Deceiving

She doesn't look like "Maria the Malicious," does she? Or, maybe she does. Does she look capable of leading someone (say, her younger brother) into battle? Oh, yeah.

Now that I've had more than 24 hours to "chill," I can finally blog about the NIGHTMARE experience I had with my lovely children (minus one) yesterday morning at the veterinarian's office.

Cheerio needed to see the vet. With Dan gone, I had been putting it off. Once he was back, I was adamant about taking her in. I'm not exactly sure why I waited, as it made absolutely no difference in the arrangements.

After dropping Jack at school and running a quick errand, I ran back home and loaded Maria, Luke, Sam and Cheerio into the van. I must have taken my brave pills, because if you know Cheerio, you know she goes bonkers when she sees a human being other than those belonging to her family. (In her mind, I'm sure she's screaming, "Adopt me! Adopt me and save me from this crazy family!!!")

Anyhow, despite her excitement, I managed to get her and my three youngest children into the vet's office and into an exam room. Sam was my little angel, but then he was being carried. Luke and Maria were... okay. Not great, but not bad. Just silly. Thankfully, Cheerio was seen right away and in no time we were finished. Strategic woman that I am, I left Maria and Luke at the coloring table in the lobby and snuck out to the van to stow the dog so I'd have one less creature to worry about while I paid my bill. (Yes, I started the car and put on the air.)

Now typically, we have the vet send us a bill rather than pay at the time of our visit. It's because we always have one or more of our children in tow and the faster we can make our escape, the better. Why didn't I do it this way yesterday, you ask? Because, since starting Uppercase Living, I have become more business-minded! I thought the transaction period would be a perfect time to pull out a catalog and suggest that the employees look it over and pass it around in the break room.

I followed through with my plan and the tech helping me was thrilled to have the catalog and said she'd just heard something from a friend about Uppercase Living. Just as I started to hear the "cha-ching" of a sale, it was drowned out by a commotion similar to a bull busting through a china shop.

HORRORS (to steal a favorite phrase of my grandmother).

With Maria as his cheerleader, Luke was ridding the shelves of their grooming supplies. Not accidentally. Not knocking a thing or two off. CLEARING... with a very fast SWEEPING motion of his entire arm. INTENTIONALLY.

Never. Never, have I been so horrified. My kids have pulled a lot of stunts. But, this... this was humiliating. If you know me, you know I am NOT a sales person. It had taken every ounce of gumption I could dig up to pull out that catalog. To have Luke pull the stunt that he did at the time that he did it was... crushing.

After pinning the kids to the floor, I helped put items back on the shelf and apologized profusely for the things that were BROKEN and SPILLED all over the place. Then I got the h*ll out of there.

I cried all the way home. I cried again when I called the office to apologize a second time and to offer to pay for what was damaged. I cried again when Dan came home for lunch and asked me if something was wrong.

Needless to say, I'm not exactly expecting any Uppercase Living orders to come from the vet's office. And, from this day forward, Dan will be taking the animals to the vet for any necessary doctoring.

If you can believe it, just this morning we had to take the cat in to be looked at. As I was dropping Dan and the cat off, Luke had the cojones to ask if he could go too. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!