An Exciting Event

today is sunday. the first day of a very emotional week. on friday this little boy will start kindergarten. i can't believe it. of course, neither can any of my close friends. they all knew me as the one that would NEVER have kids. they probably all smirked when jack came along. i think they gaped when maria followed 14 months later. jaws dropped with luke and i think minds went blank when sam showed up. i don't think they believe i live in a real house and not the funny farm...

jack and i are both nervous and excited about his new venture. he's got his uniforms, new shoes and a big kid backpack. luckily a small fee covers his supplies. i don't have to buy them, which is a good thing because for the last three years i've hyperventilated any time i've had to pass through the school supply aisle at wal-mart.

oh, and jack's had his kindergarten physical. it went smoothly enough, but when the doc predicted jack would be the class clown i got a few butterflies in my stomach. i don't know that catholic school is the place for a clown, despite his many endearing qualities (like volunteering his sister for the first round of shots).

well, wish us luck as the countdown begins. i'm sure i'll be shedding a few tears on friday. come to think of it, his teacher might, too...

Uppercase Living

so... i recently became an uppercase living demonstrator. have you seen this yet?!? it is sooooo cool. i was actually in search of something like this for maria's room and when i found uppercase, i jumped right in with both feet. i've never sold anything (other than girl scout cookies 30 years ago) but i didn't hesitate. the product sells itself! these beautiful expressions can be easily applied to your walls, windows, mirrors or any other relatively smooth surface. and (drum roll, please...) they can be REMOVED without damaging the surface. what an awesome way to add something to your home, office, car, etc.

not only do i get to be the first to show people this great new product, but i also get to have some adult time in the evenings when i do demonstrations. i didn't realize how much i needed this. it's really put a shot of energy and excitement into things for me.

go check it out at www.uppercaseliving.com. my ID # is 832718 and token is "cheerio."

the picture here is of my little boys' room...

Family Photo Update

the other day i opened our front door to see that our family photos (taken at the church, remember?) had finally arrived. i nervously opened the package and discovered, pleasantly, that the photo of our family was actually pretty good! i was excited and couldn't wait to show dan. he, too, was impressed. i set them aside to mail later. (we only got enough for my parents, dan's parents, my sisters and dan's sisters - they weren't cheap!

fast forward a few days to today. the little boys are sleeping and i decided that jack and maria had had enough tv for the day. they love to color, so i set them at the kitchen table with WASHABLE crayons and coloring books. stupidly i went upstairs to the bonus room to get on the computer. they were right downstairs, where i could hear them. they were under strict orders not to fight over the crayons or books. as i typed on the computer, i listened to them banter. things seemed to be reasonably under control, but i had heard a little thumping around (which means they weren't staying at the table). so, i thought i'd sneak down to check on them. okay. take a deep breath...

they had found the photos, opened the envelope and RIPPED THE PICTURES UP.

do i need to remind anyone what a total NIGHTMARE the picture taking session was? (check out the above info if you need reminding)

yes, i can order more pictures, but they are not cheap!!! needless to say that although i rarely spank, this was one of those times. both maria and jack got an earful, spanks on the butt and were sent to their rooms. you should have seen the look of complete outrage on their faces. like i had appeared out of nowhere and ruined some silly fun. i guess i'm an evil mom - and a pictureless one.

Photo shoot... The Day After

UPDATE!!!!
i took sam to get a synergis shot today. as i'm pulling out of the parking lot a woman comes running over. it's the deacon's wife. she was there last night during the fiasco. anyway, get this - she comes running over, asking about my kids. she was worried that i had brought sam to the doc because of his "head injury" last night. hehehehe. i told her she could relax - sam's fine! good Lord, we made an impression.

By the way...

did i mention that as dan is dragging our kids out of the room to take them to the car while i pay the kids are asking for suckers?!? luckily dan was able to restrain himself from using profainity. he simply said, "no way - you're not getting any suckers!!!" my kids have nerve, don't they?

Picture Taking Hell

so. now i know why there are no professional photos of my family when i was growing up. i also now know why the parish only attempts to publish a family photo directory once every 10 or 15 years.

6:15 p.m. isn't the best time for us as a family. in fact, it's a pretty sh*tty time. probably the worst. but, it was the only time for us to schedule the photo. (did i mention the FREE 8x10?) if we didn't do it at 6:15, it would have to be during the day (dan would miss work) or on a saturday (soccer). so. 6:15 it was. i prepared diligently. i reminded them several times throughout the day that we were having our pictures taken after dinner. i had my kids (all of them) fed early, dressed decently and ready to go by the appointed time. some were kicking and screaming, but we had the ride over to the church to cool down. i had my bribe in mind (suckers).

apparently my kids were slightly confused and thought the bribe sucked. while filing out paperwork jack and maria ran around and made faces in the mirror. luke screamed because dad wouldn't let him down. sam was an angel. we finally got going with the photographer. jack wouldn't stand still, maria kept putting her hands up and luke (after saying he wanted to be on dad's lap) kept screaming "down." the photographer tries her "everyone freeze like a popsicle!" and gets out her goofy doll to distract. (whom, i'm not sure). jack makes a face, maria closes her eyes, sam is and angel and luke starts doing the wave like they do at baseball games. after more lame bribes, lots of threats and 157 takes, the photographer gave up and said she thought she "got one". then, bravely, she asked if we'd like a pic of the kids. dan said "no," i said "yes." no, i wasn't drunk. (in hindsight, however, i probably should have had a shot or two of whiskey before leaving the house.)

the photographer asked if one of the "older" kids could hold the baby. i said yes. would a chair with a back be best? yes. maria gets the chair, we give her sam. i tell dan to supervise her while we get luke and jack squared away. dan can't resist helping with jack and WHAM! sam hits the floor. the only child behaving is now screaming and has a red mark on his forehead from where he hit the floor. maria declares, "i wasn't holding onto him very tight." no kidding. i get poor sam calmed down. we decide to put the kids on the floor. after skootching and scrunching and positioning, we think we're ready. luke starts lifting his shirt and maria and sam start listing to the side... i reposition maria and sam and give luke a repremand. it's no use. luke wants a picture of his belly. "that's it!" i say. "FORGET IT!!!" no pictures of just the kids. none.

i sit down to review the pictures of our family. ha. okay. we found one that was not as embarrassing as the rest. that will go into the directory. do we want to buy some? well, hell yes, we do -- i'm not going to go through this again any time this century!

those of you lucky enough to get a copy of the picture (or even just get a viewing) are advised to tell me how beautiful my family is and how wonderful we all look. also, be sure to frame it using archive quality stuff because you ain't ever gettin' another!

oh, and the moral of the story? bribe the PHOTOGRAPHER, not the kids. i bet if i had told her i'd spend $1,000 on prints if she could get a good pic things might have turned out differently. okay. probably not.